Surgery! Please?

Sunday morning. Happy Easter!?

We were expecting to see our OB doctor, Dr. Dickerson, who had kind of been the main doctor following me in addition to another. She came in around 9:30 am and dropped a bomb. She didn't want to operate. My heart sank. Tears came. We were 100% ready to go, cut me open, take this thing out now.

She explained that, after reviewing everything and thinking hard about it overnight, she felt the risks were too great and that I would be better off waiting as long as possible... for some miracle. She had some serious concerns that weren't mentioned earlier about me losing a lot of blood and possibly coding, resulting in needing to be resuscitated and possibly death. Risks I was aware of, but were news to Adam. This makes sense as the ovaries and uterus in general are supplied a lot of blood during pregnancy.

She went on to describe in general what my life would be like for the next few months. Deconditioning, physical therapy, possibly acupuncture for pain, ongoing drugs, effects on baby, not returning to work, going on disability, etc. I was not OK with this. I was pissed but listened to what she had to say. She left us alone to discuss and think about this. We were still waiting to talk to the gynecologist/oncologist who would have assisted with the operation.

So, back to square one. Again. I'm pissed and scared, Adam is just scared because all of a sudden there is a concern about losing me and not just the baby. He was not OK with this.

In comes my lifesaver, Dr. Weinberg. She is the gynecological oncologist that swooped in and saved the day. Confident and calm, she comes in and tells us she can operate. Not a big deal. She did one last weekend, baby and mom are fine. She felt confident she could do the minimally invasive surgery. She reassured me she felt that baby would be OK. She was so sure of herself it was almost scary.

She also had a resident with her who didn't seem quite as confident and stepped in to clarify that we had to be 100% prepared to lose the baby. Ummm OK. No one can be 100% prepared for that but I was 100% willing to take the risk because I knew I couldn't keep up with the pain much longer.

After a lengthy discussion with her, we told her LET'S DO THIS. TODAY, PLEASE. She said, "OK, I'll make it happen." Love her. This was probably about noon, and the nurse came in shortly after to say she overhead a conversation that sounded like we were looking at a 4 or 5 pm surgery. Thank God.

Looking back, we decided that our OB doctor is just that. She's a baby doctor and it's her job to take care of me and the baby. Operating to remove a mass isn't her expertise, so she was making recommendations based on how she felt and her confidence level. I am just so incredibly and beyond grateful that someone else came in who did feel confident with my issue, because there was no way we were going to go ahead with this if we didn't have someone on board we could trust with my life and the baby's.